Ebay Morons Galore!

June 17, 2008

Stupid Email of the Day

Dear (me),

would this fit a woman? or is it pretty large?

– shuzkelly

Good thing women only come in one size or else this would be a really stupid question. The item in question was a men’s size small basketball jersey and I’ve never heard someone describe a size small as “pretty large.”

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June 12, 2008

Paypal is Shit

Any other sellers out there not receiving email notification of Paypal payments being sent to you? I’m not, and it’s been a problem since late May.

Hell, I didn’t even notice until my unpaid item stack grew to a ridiculous size. I was about to file like 20 Unpaid Item Disputes when I noticed that hey, some of these people DID pay! I searched my gmail up and down — nothing. Also, people started to complain. You know how some people get when they have to wait an extra a few days for their shitty vintage t-shirts and raggity jerseys.

The problem’s not on my end and for once, the customers are not to blame. My settings are correct and gmail’s spam filter has never let me down. The problem’s gotta be Paypal’s.

I noticed on May 30 that ebay actually admitted the problem was on their/Paypal’s end. They even made an official announcement about it. However, they clear out all system announcements at the end of the month, so you can no longer find it. It was posted for about a day and a half. Great job burying the admission of guilt, assholes.

For about 10 days or so, I noticed I was still not getting all of my payment notification emails, even though the ebay announcement said the problem was resolved, so I sent Paypal a complaint letter. Here it is (stupid formatting is them.. I don’t know what their input box does to text, but it’s pretty screwy):

customer subject: Why am I not receiving all Notification emails?
customer message: Starting on May 16, I have
received MANY (no fewer than 15) Paypal payments with *NO* email
Notification. My settings are correct and the buyers paid properly. This
is very important because I use those emails to ship. I didn’t realize
this problem until people started complaining about slow shipping weeks
later, and I’ve already received bad feedback about this. I noticed that
people on popular message boards have been having the same problem. What
is going on?? This is ridiculous.

After a few days, I finally get a response.

Dear (me),

Thanks for contacting PayPal.

In order to best assist you, we recommend that you contact us by
telephone for resolution/clarification. You may contact PayPal’s
Customer Service at 1-402-935-2050.

For future reference, this information is also located in the Help
Center, and is easily accessible by following these steps:
1. Visit https://www.paypal.com/.
2. Click the “Contact Us” link.
3. In the “Help by Phone” section click the “Customer Service
Center” link.

Thank you for using PayPal for your online payment needs.

Sincerely,
Doug
PayPal Resolution Services
PayPal, an eBay Company

What? I have to call them now? Just tell me what is going on. I’ve called Paypal before and it’s always a disaster. You’re on hold for at least half an hour, then you talk to a person who clearly shouldn’t be working there, then you get transfered to another person who you have to explain the entire situation to before they explain how they can’t help you and how you should call this other number. No, I won’t be doing that.

Is it that hard to tell me what is going on in writing? Is that it? Do they really not want an admission of error in written form? Why the hell do I have to call anyway? What are they going to do for me? Just fix the problem and people won’t complain.

The worst part is that this notification email problem is STILL going on. Just 20 minutes ago, I logged into my account and noticed I missed a payment from two days ago. Paypal’s service has been abysmal so far in 2008 and it doesn’t look like that’ll be changing soon.

June 11, 2008

Stupid Email of the Day

Hi,

Can I please cancel this order? Sorry, I wanted something else. Thanks.

Danny

I got this a full day after they won the auction and paid. By this point, I had already shipped and they received the notification email. Who the hell decides they want another item after they win AND pay? I never responded, the DC number shows the package was delivered, and so far, everything seems ok.

June 9, 2008

Stupid Email of the Day

Dear (me),

thanks for the feedback you never left me douche bag

– (idiot from Virginia)

This isn’t so much a stupid email as it is a funny one. I love how offended buyers get when sellers don’t immediately leave feedback. Who cares if all you use your account for is bidding?

Not to mention I don’t leave feedback for buyers in protest of ebay’s ridiculous new feedback rules. Feedback is dead to me, and I officially don’t care about it anymore. Even when I used to leave feedback, I’d do it in bunches (once a month or so), and I would still get messages like this.

June 4, 2008

Terrible Auction of the Day

Some people take those McFarlane sports figures and customize them to other players, usually ones that McFarlane hasn’t made yet, or ever will. When done properly, these customized figures are very impressive and sell for six to eight times the price of the original figure. When done improperly, you get laughed at, like this guy who made this disaster:

JIM KELLY CUSTOM MCFARLANE BUFFALO BILLS LEGEND NIP (item #220242349519)

Oops:

JIM KELLEY

Um…

JIM KELLEY

Niiiiiiice. His name is actually spelled Jim “Kelly” just so we’re clear. Hours of work thrown away. A job well done, sir!

June 3, 2008

Stupid Email of the day

Dear (me),

Hi, although I don’t have paypal account, I will bid for this item. I will create my paypal account tomorrow morning so don’t worry if I win. Thanks 🙂

– a_sixt

I think the simple concept of “Paypal Required” is lost here. Tomorrow morning is a bit too late to create your account because the item ended a few hours ago. Oops.

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